Thanks for reading my little blurb. Your comments were very thought and insightful provoking. You strike the nail on the relative head. WHILE I was with the TG community everyone was concentrating on studying all things feminine. Makeup. Voice. Posture. Walking. Psychology. Communication style. Outfits both formal and casual. Some talked of transitioning even.
I was immersed in this for a long time, infatuated with it in fact. Something was missing. It was as if as a lady you were likely to be “sugar and spice and everything nice” and I just didn’t feel that way constantly regardless of how I used to be dressed. Many years ago (back 1990 or so) I wrote an autobiography by hand.
- 8 years back from MIssouri, USA
- 8 years ago from Flagstaff, Arizona
- 6 years ago from Seattle, WA
- Chlorogenic acid for acne prone pores and skin
The thing was over 600 pages long and took two years to write. I was surprised at the gobbledygook that had been cemented in my subconscious, the rage I experienced towards Midwestern thinking, traditional people, and other authoritarians. Ok last one, I also wrote a ton of stuff on fetishes and cross dressing that I had been overlooking for a long time.
Some of this is still with me. From reading books like “Radical Honesty” by Brad Blanton, I found that the mind will not operate in a particularly logical manner. Scary but his prose, caustic, and honest brutally, matched my very own brain waves at times. It’s not particularly feminine but I cannot believe that way. Sometimes there’s just no way to sugar-coat things.
Purging: Here’s another comment that you wrote. I think this is your trying to keep that essential balance in your daily life. You start off being raised in a single gender with all the trappings that choose it. Then you uncover the other side and what you’ve been missing and you also immerse yourself in that side. At some point you might feel you are “overdoing it” and stop, draw your head out.
You need a breather. The other part seems more natural, but it’s perhaps, much of a very important thing too. I, too, go through a “purging” period, however when I purge I simply stop venturing out and take long naps throughout the day. That is true also. Last weekend I went to consume with a GG friend (in the “drab”) and the waiter kept discussing us as “you two ladies.” We giggled. I felt like pigging out and I did.